Yet Again on Death

When I talk about my past I feel the connection between myself and the person those events happen around; as when I tell a story in a bar of camping in winter or when I explain my experiences in a job interview. If somebody asks me what were you thinking camping in the cold, I can reflect back and either tell of how cold i had felt, or how I enjoyed the other aspects of spending the day and night out of town in nature. Whatever my response, I will be very clear, at least to myself, about how I initiated a feeling, thought or mode of action. There is sense of ownership in my perception of any series of past events which are more or less vividly related to me like the camping memory, or which constitute part of my character like the interview stories where I promoted a side of my character to an employer.

There are more characteristics and traits that we either see as our own. What most of these characteristics have in common is that we are so certain of them. In fact I want to make the claim that it is this certainty that makes us take ownership of some of the characteristics we have.

I think we tend to learn to deal with daily events through tasks that are part of our habits, or put more clearly, part of what we have learned. We tend to customize as we repeat them more. We add our own bits and pieces of methodology to these tasks based on our experience of works or what we hear from others approaches to the same task. These customizations do not necessarily make the task easier to do (though most times they do) but what they do is they make us feel that the task is what 'we' did. The customizations provide us with justification to take ownership and attach it to that thing that we take as being ourselves. When faced with necessities that call for a task, what we call upon is usually a habitual process that we unfold in the task with the understanding that the unfolding is created by us.

Facing death is a task too. Many times during our lives we hear about death as our loved ones pass, or as people talk about it. And though we are always in a sense in the presence of death, we never wholly realize it. We never take ownership, we never start a process to make it a habit. There are many events about which we are not as certain as death and yet we still prepare to face them by trying to learn new habits and tasks, like a new job, or a masters degree, or marriage. But there is a sense of procrastination, and forgetfulness when the necessities call for facing death. You could be a doctor and have looked at many being rushed to the hospital but not making it. Even then, you would not necessarily have to face this inevitable event in our lives. Because we can choose to ignore, and forget, and not learn nothing, and that's precisely what many do. Even if hearing about it, and facing it would have managed to become a habit, without getting fancied with side-dishes and appetizers then it would be great. I think it's already too late though. There are companies running funeral companies that make very good money to provide a service that people who are facing death would have to pay for.

I have a very particular feeling about this, that I try to convey to people on their Birth Days. I have a feeling that there should not be that much of a difference between birthday, and the day you die. They are both events out of your control, expect that the date for the latter is unknown. But, which day would you rather celebrate the on the night before? The day that happens only once a year, on a fixed date and time? or a day that may as well be the next day of your life?